It’s been a while – and I was hoping that it would mean I didn’t need to give another “well, I’, still alone” update, but…here we are.
Its December, getting closer to Christmas, New Years, and my birthday, and Im still by myself. I don’t even have anything interesting to show for it. I keep trying to do something to change how my life has been going – but its difficult.
Work – it keeps me busy, that’s for sure. This year alone, in the span of like 3 months I went from Vancouver to Halifax and places in between. I worked on a show where the pope came to Canada – that’s something not everyone can say they have done. I met a lot of people during these trips, that is true, but it isn’t the same as meeting someone who you can do things outside of work with.
People tell me to go out and try to meet people. Sure, easy to say – but not so easy to do. Not only am I ridiculously shy around people I don’t know, but I also don’t even know half the time if I am working the following week until Saturday – or if I will even be in the province. Trying to plan anything can be …difficult.
It doesn’t help that many of my friends are either in long-term relationships or just not available due to their own work or distance. It means even if I am off, they have other things that they are doing – and again, when you can’t plan until the last second, its not surprising. It means I spend a lot of time at home – sure I’m caught up on a lot of shows on Netflix, but…its not the point.
Do I try to get out when I am away for work? Of course, I do. But, sometimes you are just too tired to go out. And as someone who doesn’t drink, you don’t always just want to go to the bar every night and babysit others.
So, right now I am right where I was two years ago. Work, eat, sleep, repeat. Will it ever change? I hope so! But, I’m not the type of person who just walks up to people and starts talking to them – just not my personality.
The question is – is there anyone who will actually help me?